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Ader Lina "Jerry" Stiver  1925-2005
 

My name is Krissy Amyx and Ader Lina Stiver, known to most of us as "Jerry", was my Grandma.  She passed away last week.  On April 24th she would have been 80 years old.
 
I wish I had learned more about how my grandma spent her childhood, how she grew into a young woman, a wife, and a devoted mother.  I was lucky to have known how she lived her life after becoming a grandmother.  My sister Heather and I spent many, many summers with her.  I remember playing at the park, walking to M System to buy ice cream, riding our bikes and always getting flat tires.  We would have to go to JT's so he could air them back up, then the other tire would get a flat the very next day.  She would let us stay up really late to watch scary movies.  Once she spent what seemed like hours, sweeping out my dad's old shop, just to we could roller skate in it.  That was so much fun.
 
My grandma was such a considerate woman, she was always thinking of everyone else.  And she was so beautiful, both inside and out.  Her hair was always blonde and her nails were long and brightly polished.  When I visited with her three weeks ago, she said that she wished her hair had turned grey like other womens.  But hers just wouldn't go grey.  She enjoyed wearing wigs when she was younger so recently she decided to have a blonde wig ordered, it had just arrived when I last saw her.  Luckily, she did get the chance to wear it and I'm so glad she did.
 
Jerry loved taking care of cats, whether they were hers or not, shelling pecans for her daughter-in-law Julie and working in her garden, when she was in better health.  She was the one who taught me what crepe myrtles, Indian paintbrushes and buttercups looked like.  Above all things she loved her friends and family. 
 
Although her family was spread across two different states, she kept us all up-to-date with each others lives through phone calls, letters and especially emails.  We're all so fortunate that she was never intimidated my learning new things, such as surfing the Internet.  We will all miss her daily emails and I know it's okay if we still continue to email her, she'll receive them in her own way.  God has his own "Internet".
 
She didn't need many material things to please her, simply a few good mystery books, a 500-piece puzzle, and a challenging crossword or word search puzzle.  She kept her mind sharp while her body would weaken.
 
This past Christmas Jerry received a small red pickup truck to replace her 1978 orange Pinto.  I remember showing her all the necessary parts so she could drive around town.  I was afraid she would either never drive it, unless she really had to, or that she'd have an accident and swear off driving all together.  Turns out my worries were all wrong.  She enjoyed driving the truck to the grocery store and Dollar Stores and even out to the cemetery once with Geneva.  In her daily journal she noted that she was proud of herself for learing how to open the truck's hood.  March 8th this year she renewed her driver's license for six years, she wondered if she would even live that long.
 
Jerry was prepared for her passing and openly spoke about her wishes with her close friends.  I know that she is happy with the choices we have made and probably wished we hadn't fussed over her so much.  We're lucky that she made so many things easier for us, however our healing is a process not so easily achieved.  There is an emptiness in our lives where our friend, our neighbor, our mother, our grandmother, our Jerry should still and always be.
 
I truly feel at peace with my Grandma being in Heaven.  I know that now she can see, move and breathe easier.  I know that she's with her son Stephen, brother JT, and grandson Paul, all to keep her company.  I imagine her watching over us all, as a Guardian Angel -- a job she was meant to be.

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